I found this tidbit on the internet yesterday and e-mailed it to half my company - Is your boss a seagull manager? Do they fly in, make a lot of noise, poop all over everything, and then leave?


Answer: YES.


In recent months I have been given the great privilege of working with a Seagull Manager. He comes in for five seconds, asks what I have been doing, throws a large pile of shit at me and then proceeds to disappear until the time comes to do it all again. I have worked for my company for over a year now and I find that as much as it bugs the hell out of me, it’s no sweat off my back because I’m used to it, I’ve worked here for a long time and I really don’t care anymore.


Yes if you have that type of manager you are not alone. It seems to happen quite often in the work force and there is nothing you can do about it. It’s part of your job and you just have to deal with it. If you are anyone besides a manager just suck it up, because we’re in this for the long haul and no matter what you say or do, there is no way to avoid it.


The only thing you really can do take it or leave your job. I plan on taking that route. For me it’s quite simple and things have been going badly anyway. We have so many disgruntled employees that me not leaving would be complete idiocy on my part. My manager micro-managing me and calling me a slacker (I’m a workaholic, so jokes on him) has become daily routine. I have even been sucked in to a corporate hell meeting where they threatened me for using Instant Messenger. They have blocked AIM, MSN, Yahoo mail and IM and of course the illustrious myspace. I feel sorry for the new hire’s because thy have no idea what they are getting into. Doesn’t matter what position they are in here, unless they have the same title as the evil overlord of my company they are royally screwed.


I often what I am doing in Administration/Bookkeeping because it seems that being a Manager is the ideal job. All you really have to do is micro-manage the hell out of people, implement new and uncomfortable corporate by-laws that you don’t have to follow, make everyone hate you and get paid a lot. How awesome is that? You can even sit around and hem and haw with the big boys never having to take responsibility for your company or the mistakes you make. It’s always just a matter of finding the right scapegoat.


Really I think it’s the right idea. Unfortunately being a girl I will never be part of the big boys club, I can on the other hand become a Manager at another company and become a supreme bitch and get away with it. Yes my stronghold will be my office and taking hour and a half lunch hours will be my revenge. I will call them ‘business meetings’ and expense 150 steaks at chi-chi restaurants in Beverly Hills. Micro-managing others will be come my favorite activity during the day and I will be the supreme seagull of my trashy roost.


Do you have a Seagull manager, or are you one? Which would you prefer? Remember hard working toadies are a dime a dozen, but it takes no effort and a lot of loud noise to become a Manager.

Posted by Fyrewolf at 12:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)